THE WORST FEARS MEME

[discorderly]

The Worst Fears Meme

Seriously, didn't your mother ever teach you not to walk through ominous unmarked doors in ominous catacombs of ominous castles?

Or maybe you've just got a boggart in your cupboard, who knows. Regardless, you are now trapped within your own worst fears. Hopefully someone can go and get you out of them!

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[discorderly]

Discord lopes calmly through the streets of this Other Ponyville, completely ignoring everyone and everything around him. Well, maybe not completely. It's been a little while since ponies ran screaming in terror from him.

But after cackling, chasing a few around, and snapping his jaws at a few tail-tips, he loses interest pretty fast. If he wanted to terrorize imaginary ponies in a magically-created mind construct, he can do it by himself. Sombra, pffft. So instead the draconequus casually starts bounding towards Sweet Apple Acres, singing loudly

It just comes out as dueling banjo music.

[caneattheseapples]

It is too early in the day for banjo music like that, so Jappleack immediately knows that something is up. Jappleack's ears perk up, just a bit, as she looks out towards where the music is coming from.

And then her blood runs cold and she feels like she could vomit her own heart out.

For a moment, she just sits there, trembling. There's so many thoughts racing through her head, so many possible reactions that she's overloaded with information on how to react. She just sits and stares, and stares, and stares.

And then she's running to the shed where they keep some of the smaller farm equipment. And she's pulling out the wood axe.

And then, still screaming, she's running right at Discord.

"I WILL CUT YOU APART MOFO!!"

Her voice is high, shrill, dangerously so, and she's barely looking where she's swinging this crazy ass axe. Doesn't matter.

She's either going to get horribly murdered or get her a piece of this son of a bitch, as far as she can tell. Either way it works out for her.

[discorderly]

Jappleack must have rolled a natural 20, because she cuts Discord into several neat pieces with very little struggle. The whole affair is surprisingly bloodless.

The body parts lay limp on the ground, and his head is definitely not watching her to see what she'll do next (and possibly repressing giggles). Super dead. Yep. Good job! You won!

[caneattheseapples]

It's kind of surprising how easily she takes him apart. In fact, it's so easy that there's no real reward to it. No feeling of satisfaction, as she look at his oddly cleanly cut apart body.

No. She hasn't won. And she never will.

She howls, lifting the axe up again and, this time, bringing the blunt side of the head down at Discords face. And lifting it up and bringing it down again. And again. Stop smiling at her, you asshole. She'll rearrange that when she bashes your face into being non-recognizable.

[discorderly]

Goodness. Normally he wouldn't be concerned about the rules, but they do have a rating to keep to here, don't they? Discord's canny enough to know not to upset the network.

Also, this doesn't appear to be working the way he thought it might. You know, kill the monster, escape the death trap, all the sort of thing? Very narrative-driven. There's a congratulatory sound as a text box pops up nearby:

ACHIEVEMENT: CHAOS KILLER

And then Discord's disembodied voice says, "If you're quite done now? Loathe as I am to say it, I think we're simply going to have to have a heart-to-heart." Ohhhh, just go in after her, Discord. It'll be safest for you. You won't run into any trouble, Discord. Twilight owes him one after this.

[caneattheseapples]

It's a good thing Discord spoke up, otherwise Jappleack would have been...no content, but willing to roll with hitting him in the face over and over again. She wheels around at the sound of his voice, clutching the axe close to her.

"I don't want to talk!" the scream is born out of fear as much as anger. "I wan you dead! I want you gone and to just leave me alone!"

[discorderly]

"I really don't want to carry you out of Sombra's dungeon," Discord's voice replies, his body remaining where it is. "And I'm quite certain I'd have to, so I think you're just going to have to come on out of here yourself. You make an excellent Jack Horseance, but you're no Daring Do. Honestly, Jappleack, I thought the trap was obvious!"

But whatever, it doesn't matter now. He likes her well enough that he probably would have come to do this even without everyone else's insistence, but Twilight is the one who suggested he should maybe NOT use his powers to forcibly drag her out of her. Shame.

"If you'd like to continue with the pinata thing, though, I really don't mind. You know, I met your Fluttershy just down the way?" There's a pause, before he says in a surprisingly genuine manner, "Your Equestria is terrible."